I've been cleaning out my room lately and reorganizing stuff, and came across a stack of notebooks from college. That's right, I never throw anything away, you never know when you'll need those old chemistry notes. Anyway, reading through my notebooks made me discover two very important things. First, I'm so happy I never have to write a research paper again. Second, I apparently love smith bling a lot, because I came across a rather erotic poem I once wrote and had published in the columns:
Oh smith bling, your blinging makes me crazy,
You bling with so much bling I wanna have 10,000 of your babies.
To the hallway toll I'll give all of my coins,
If only you'll let me rub your loins.
Late at night when I hear your screams,
I wanna do you, you're in all of my dreams.
My knees go weak when you play that song,
Checkin' out your gravel pit makes me wanna take off my thong.
My heart beats faster than the wings of a dove,
Nevermind the old crow, I wanna get drunk on your love.
Playing halo makes me break into a sweat,
And when you taze each other I can't help but get wet.
Your massive package is a work of art,
Forget fire hazards, someone put out this burning in my heart.
I love you even though you did my mom,
'Cause I saw it on smithblinggivesgoodhead.com.
I love every little thing you do,
Oh smith bling, I wanna make sweet love to you.
There's also another stanza with a big X through it that didn't make it into the final draft:
When I think about you late at night it's hard to control my hand,
You make me wanna creep downstairs and jump on your raging cockstand.
I'm not sure why I decided to cut that one.