Monday, June 29, 2009

Creepy News to Start your Monday

First off, we'll go with the slightly ominous, but also slightly cool:
Biological fuel cell - A device with a lot of useful potential for implanted devices, such as heart monitors or blood sugar detectors (for people with diabetes). Not so bad, though a little odd if you start thinking about 10 gallon drums filled with blood to power heavy machinery.

Then you get into the nightmare fuel:
Carniverous Clock - A clock that powers itself by capturing insects, dumping them in a vat of bacterial solvents and harvesting their life force to power its terrible difference engine.

The matrix wasn't THAT far off, it looks like. Except in the future the robots wont bother keeping us alive, they'll just be breeding us like cattle and tossing us into big dissolution vats after sucking out our blood for their fuel cells.

I'm going to go cry in a corner now.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Celebrity death pool

Thom, wasn't it you who told me a year or so ago that you and your coworkers were in on a celebrity death pool one year? Someone has gotta be raking it in right now, although I don't know if I'd put pitchman Billy Mays on a list of celebrities...

If I had to guess who's going to go next, I'd say Nelson Mandela or Queen Elizabeth II. They're both so OLD.

My dark horse in the race would be Kirstie Alley.
The person I most wish would die: Dick Cheney or Fred Phelps (of the Westboro Baptist Church).
Others that are likely to die: Wilford Brimley, Joan Rivers, Keith Richards and Mick Jagger

Friday, June 26, 2009

My favorite candy

I am curious as to what everyone's favorite candies are. Here are my top 3 chocolate and non-chocolate, in order.

1. Twix
2. Kit Kat (close second)
3. 100 Grand

Non-chocolate (this was tough)
1. Jelly Bellies
2. Skittles (all kinds, but has anyone seen those chocolate skittles? WTF?)
3. Lemonheads

Honorable mention:
Plain Hershey's
Malted milk balls
Rock candy
Those swirly multi-colored lolli-pops
Lifesaver Wint-O-Green mints
Any candy stolen from children

Thursday, June 25, 2009

IQ test

I'm tired of just assuming I'm smarter than everyone and want to prove it. Have any of you ever taken an IQ test? I want to take one.

Thursday, June 04, 2009


I am going to go to Beale Street and the MLK museum and Graceland, and I'm going to be stone drunk every step of the way and it's going to be awesome. I'm going to puke on Beale Street. I'm going to puke on the spot MLK was shot. And I'm going to puke on Elvis' garage door.

Get ready to get puked on, Memphis.

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Grossly inappropriate

Anyone care to guess why? We can make a game of it!

Monday, June 01, 2009

Your daily dose of madness

Presenting ... ZLAD!

5... 4... 3... 1! OFFBLAST!

And of course, the clear follow-up!

Best cantaloupe imagery used in a fake balkan state keytar assisted 80's metal anthem? I think so!