Dear *Insert Student Loan Company Name*:
Why, oh why, do you think I have money? I selected "income-contingent" because I thought you would realize I don't have a lot of money, but apparently you like getting all theoretical, annualizing money that I don't have, nay, never will have each year as you estimate the "fair" payments I should make each month. Hopefully, my latest letter to you will clear things up. Thank you for your time. And yes, I refuse to be your friend, you lo(a)ner.
Cordially,
The Borrower
P.S.-Somewhere stored away in a closet there is a piece of paper that I paid way too much money for and now I can't make a profit off it. It would've been a good investment had the economy decided to remain healthy. Bummer, just a bummer.
3 comments:
Great letter. Don't worry. Palmer said that anytime soon he's going to be super rich and he'll buy us all a new Smith Ground we can live on for free or close to free. You hear that, Johnboy? ANY TIME SOON.
I think he was planning on making millions before being 30-something. There's still time. I can't wait for the new Smith Ground!
P.S.-Somewhere stored away in a closet there is a piece of paper that I paid way too much money for and now I can't make a profit off it. It would've been a good investment had the economy decided to remain healthy. Bummer, just a bummer.
.. are you talking about Andrew's soul plate? Because I'm interested if you're looking to sell.
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