Smith Ground

Snow Job

2012-01-30T23:13:00.003-05:00

On this unseasonably warm winter evening, a reflection: Those guys sure know how to have fun!

Celebrity Death Pool 2012

2012-01-30T22:11:00.001-05:00

I know I'm way late on this and will abstain from competition and from also knowing who has already died this year. This is my list for the remainder of the year, just for the hell of it. I CANNOT win, just for fun for me. I'll try to remember next year.
1. Nelson Mandela
2. Prince Philip
3. Betty White
4. Jimmy Carter
5. Wilford Brimley
6. Sir Thomas Sean Connery
7. Queen Elizabeth II
8. Muhammad Ali
9. Casey Anthony
10. Joan Rivers

Oh no!

2012-01-08T18:57:00.000-05:00

It's a five-day work week! Noooooo!!!

2012 Celebrity Death Pool

2012-01-01T19:00:00.006-05:00

A reminder of the rules to Thom and anyone else who wants to partake in the 2012 Celebrity Death Pool:
1) You choose 10 people and post them to the Blog
2) You can only take five of the people from your list the previous year
3) At mid-year, five extra people can be chosen
4) Each entrant must forfeit $10 to the winner
5) In the event of a tie, monies are split

Also, Thom - since rule #5 says monies are split, I don't think we should continue over from last year. We both "won", so...

Here's my list:

Zsa Zsa Gabor*
Ariel Sharon*
Dick Cheney
Stephen Hawking
Billy Graham
Nelson Mandela*
Kirk Douglas*
Ernest Borgnine
Jerry Lewis
Fidel Castro*

* used last year

History of the Death Pool:
Thom won in 2010 with 1 death.
Thom and Waple tied in 2011 with 2 deaths apiece (Waple - Steve Jobs, Kim Jong-Il, Thom - Elizabeth Taylor, Kim Jong-Il)

Celebrity Death Pool 2012

2012-01-01T18:47:00.003-05:00

Everyone will die, because it's the end of the world! No, just kidding.

Here is my list for 2012:

Aretha Franklin*

Ray Bradbury*

Jerry Lewis*

Billy Graham*

Zsa Zsa Gabor*

Margaret Thatcher

Joe Paterno

Mickey Rooney

Muhammad Ali

Eli Wallach

*Used last year.

May your days be shiny and bright.

2011-12-19T12:14:00.002-05:00

Ok, so maybe I don't check/contribute to this blog often enough. However, when I do, I usually upload amazing photos from those sweet days at Collins. I miss you all a lot.

Dating Is Worthless (to Me)

2011-12-16T16:13:00.002-05:00

Time to vent... I've tried all sorts of dating sites. Every girl I meet is not right for me. I've been on all sorts of dates without anything coming of it. I've even created a set of superficial guidelines to determine whether I should spend time pursuing certain girls. I've had too many worthless dates to not have a screening process. I have resigned myself to being a bachelor. I'm perfectly content being alone. It doesn't bother me. I know I'm awesome. If no one else sees that, it's their problem. In other words, dating is worthless to me.

Testing 1-2-3

2011-12-11T17:16:00.000-05:00

Does anyone read this anymore?

New job = MASSIVE CELEBRATION!

2011-11-04T02:12:00.003-04:00

All my hard work and patience has paid off. I have a new job. Let's celebrate! When is everyone free for a financially irresponsible night in the city? Um, I didn't mean that. I've learned my lessons. Nothing but fiscal responsibility here. Regardless, let's celebrate!

Charles Benson: Machine or Man?

2011-09-10T19:59:00.003-04:00

I still can't decide on this one. Janet said that after six years of dating him, she "thinks" he's human. I'm more inclined to believe he's a robot. That, or he's John Connor.

Epic Tweedy.

2011-09-09T15:37:00.003-04:00

How did you bastards miss this show? I say Thom books him next.

How was the trip?

2011-08-27T19:00:00.001-04:00

Mike and Waple- Tell us all about the trip out East!

The Movie of Your Life

2011-08-23T20:19:00.002-04:00

Someone is going to make a movie about your life. What will it be called and who will play you?

Here are mine:

Comedy- "Laughing Giant" starring Jason Segal

Drama- "Will Write for Food" starring James Franco (because of his killer writing background outside of acting)

Too Much Sleep

2011-07-31T16:38:00.002-04:00

I have come to the determination that I need more sleep than the required 7-8 hours per night. I'm not quite sure how much sleep I need, but I think it's closer to 12 hours than 7. In other words, my body wants me to sleep half of every day. That's absurd. What about you? How much sleep do you think you need?

Betty Ford

2011-07-09T17:49:00.000-04:00

Was Betty Ford on any of our lists?

Story of My Life

2011-07-03T17:05:00.002-04:00

Sometimes I feel like I am reconstructing my life ever so slowly. I once had a good job in my field before that industry did a nose-dive and I made some bad decisions; I once produced a brand-new major work of writing every year; and I once had a girlfriend. Now I'm taking small steps to regain those things: I recently accepted a part-time copy editor position and started my own editorial business; I'm trying to write something big every day and I hope to attend grad school for a creative writing MFA soon; and I keep going on dates with no love connections being made. In other words, I'm working my way back to where I once was; I am reconstructing my life. So far, it's all a way too gradual work-in-progress. I'm getting impatient...

$ = Power

2011-06-28T13:38:00.001-04:00

George Ryan got to visit his dying wife in the hospital in secret several times, despite several requests by his lawyer and denials by a judge. The warden of the hospital let him go. I think this is total bull.

Ow!

2011-06-28T11:03:00.001-04:00

I have a kink in my neck, and it hurts! End transmission.

Mr. Waple's Group is Awesome!

2011-06-17T21:52:00.002-04:00

I just wanted to say that, if Mr. Waple ever feels bad about how things turned out at his last job, he can look at the Facebook group and judge by the comments that he was a well-liked, great teacher.

If you like meat like I do...

2011-06-10T01:53:00.002-04:00

You should sign up for Texas de Brazil's e-club. Here's why. Sign up here. Also, enter here for a chance to win a free meal for four.

These Brazilian steakhouses, or churrascarias, are my favorite places to eat. If you are a man, you should sign up. If you are a girl or a girly man, man up.

Obligatory Updates

2011-06-06T16:54:00.002-04:00

I've been keeping myself busy. I still have the same content screening job. But, I'm also doing this...

-New Zealand was incredible, as you already probably know. I barely had any time back home before I was called in to do some test scoring for Pearson. I was fast, probably too fast, at scoring tests. It was fun!

-I'm upset that the Bulls lost to the Heat. I wish the Heat would lose to the Mavs, but it's highly doubtful.

-Thanks to John's help, To a T Editorial Group is in business. Visit www.tteditorialgroup.com to learn more. You can judge how successful my business is by the thickness of my wallet. It's not all about the cash, though. Also, as a public service, To a T is on Twitter, offering daily grammar tips (@TTEditorial). It's also on Facebook (facebook.com/TTEditorialGroup) where short weekly articles about writing and publishing are posted. Thanks to those of you who liked the company Facebook page!

-I'm working on two major writing projects: One is really ambitious, and the other is a collection of all the Insanity's Cure columns from back in the day. Fun!

-I try to write on my personal blog daily. It's almost always fiction, poetry, or some other creative form of writing.

-I created a fan page for myself on Facebook. At first, I wasn't sure if it was a good idea because I hate seeming egotistical, but then I realized that I had a Facebook group devoted to my writing and Facebook plans on phasing it out, so it made sense to start the page. I've always been bad about promoting my writing, so I figure this is a good way to do it. Hopefully, I'll get some fans on there, because that "0 People Have Liked This Page" makes me depressed. Then again, I suppose I could like it, which would make things even more pathetic: "You're your one and only fan."

-I exercise as often as possible.

-I'm hitting the road for Kansas City tomorrow morning. Wish me safe travels!

Feel free to update all of us on your lives, if you want! I'd love to hear what's been going on as I'm sure everyone else would. I realize most of us saw each other last month, but it doesn't hurt to stay updated. Plus, I was hoping we could get the Smith Ground blog going again.

I hate my knee and other new things

2011-04-29T22:45:00.002-04:00

Hello.

As you may know, I injured my knee a few weeks ago, in the dumbest way possible. It's an overuse injury from WALKING TOO MUCH. It's basically all new york city's fault. I was there for three days, which pretty much equated to three solid days of walking, as that's the main thing to do in NYC: walk around the neighborhoods, walk around central park, walk around art museums, etc. By day three I had a serious limp and excruciating pain. Not really an ideal vacation, plus it was cold and rainy the whole time. I would much rather have been relaxing on a beach somewhere.

Anyway, after continuing to limp for 2 weeks with little improvement, I finally gave in and went to the doctor, where I was diagnosed with patellar bursitis. The fluid sac between my knee and thigh bone is all inflamed from overuse. So I was given an anti-inflammatory/painkiller, and told to avoid excessive walking, and if it's not better in 2 weeks I can get x-rays and try physical therapy. The two week period is almost up, and I am walking significantly better. However I still have to be really careful with it, it still hurts to bend it in certain ways, which means I can't dance. Not being able to dance is absolute torture. I think I do need physical therapy, because clearly I don't know how to walk properly if I could hurt myself so easily. I'm just worried I will not be able to afford it, as my insurance sucks.

In other news, my birthday is soon. I've decided not to do anything for it this year though. Since I'm turning 28 I had the idea to have a "28 days later" themed party entitled "28 years later," but I couldn't figure out how to translate that into decorations and activities, probably because I've never seen the movie. Trying to think of something cool to do ended up being too stressful so I gave up. I will just be going on a quiet dinner date with matt, which I'm actually quite excited for.

Also, I moved into the most amazing new apartment with matt and our other roommate kevin. It's in Wicker Park, right near the intersection of milwaukee north and damen. I hope you guys can come see it one day, the neighborhood is really cool.

I'm excited to hear about thom's trip to australia!!

ROAD TRIP

2011-04-14T20:16:00.002-04:00

For the third summer in a row, I want to try a road trip to the New England area. And for the third year in a row I assume it will fail. But I am going to try anyway. I want to have at least 2 people come with (but ideally 2). That way gas prices won't be quite so disheartening, and there will still be room in the car for stuff. I also don't know if my car will be the best vehicle for this trip, so it's doubtful it'd happen unless someone else said, "Yeah! Let's take my car!" Really, the only reason my car wouldn't be good is because it doesn't have working AC, but that can be fixed easily enough. It also doesn't have a whole lot of space in the back (hence only 2 other people) and it isn't fast (over 70 and it is just loud, as if it's saying "What did I do to deserve this?"). So I want to know what all of you clowns think of this. I foresee it being about a 10-day trip. One day there, one day back, and 8 days in a lot of states.

Discuss:
availability/vacation time
car use
duration
ideas for making the trip better (I am flexible on the location, but if you have ideas on things to do/see in the area that'd help motivate people, like me)

Also, I have family/friends in Baltimore & DC that we could stay with for free, and Randall & Jayna are in RI. Just sayin'.

This celebrity death pool is KILLING me (get it?)

2011-03-23T12:55:00.002-04:00

Both Elizabeth Taylor and Jack LaLanne have died, and I had both on my list last year and not this year. I'm going to have to start taking matters into my own hands.

Update us!

2011-03-20T16:41:00.002-04:00

Let's get an update from everyone who reads this blog! Since it is my request, I will go first: I'm getting by, working that one job, hoping to write more often, and I plan to double up on my exercise routine. That, and next month it's off to New Zealand! Then, the month after that, it's the official launch of my business! Since I can't seem to catch a break, I'll make my own luck.

Oscar Prediction

2011-02-27T16:41:00.002-05:00

The Oscars are tonight. I have one prediction: M. Night Shyamalan won't win anything for "The Last Airbender."

Adding photos

2011-02-14T21:42:00.002-05:00

Can anyone (probably Mike) tell me how to add photos to the side of the blog? I gather that it's not easy, and/or that it requires a picasa login. I want to put some more photos of us up.

New Radiohead!

2011-02-14T16:01:00.001-05:00

Ahem... the new Radiohead, "King of Limbs," went on sale today! Check it out: www.kingoflimbs.com

A Career-Ending Grammy

2011-02-13T16:28:00.005-05:00

I'm working tonight, and I believe the Grammys are going to be airing. I don't really care that I'll be missing them: Muse is the only performing act that I care about, and they aren't even that great anymore. I feel like the Grammys ruin things. If The Black Keys win anything tonight, I hope they don't start sucking. Perhaps I'm being too harsh. My apologies to those of you who enjoy the Grammys and the artists it supports. I just don't know why an awards ceremony that is supposed to honor the best in music can be so repulsive to me, and yet an awards ceremony that is supposed to honor the best in cinema (the Oscars, for example) tends to interest me. Music has always been a huge interest of mine, but the Grammys make me ill.

Three Decades

2011-02-07T16:49:00.002-05:00

This summer, I will turn 29. I'm almost 30. If I'm still where I am now in terms of my accomplishments and my life next year, I fear that I'll die from despondency. Seriously, though, I realize life isn't all about achievements, but I never want to feel unfulfilled or at least left with the feeling that I could have done more in the time I was given. There are many things I have done in my life so far that I'm proud of, but it is not enough to quench my thirst for accomplishment. It's almost like an addiction. Anyway, I guess if I ever did feel completely fulfilled, life wouldn't really feel like it's worth living anymore. I suppose my lack of fulfillment is actually a driving force for me to be ambitious and do better. What about you all? Are you satisfied with where you are now in your life?

Super Bowl Party!

2011-02-05T17:30:00.002-05:00

If you're having one, enjoy it! And think of me: I'll be working and unable to watch.

Compromised?

2011-02-05T17:23:00.003-05:00

I'm guessing since Andrew is feeling like he is the only one who uses this blog anymore, I'll go ahead and write something. All I have to say is, random note: Should I be worried that e-mails keep randomly disappearing from my inbox on one of my many accounts? What's weird is that I had a practically uncrackable password. I'm hoping it's just a technical glitch since I'm syncing between numerous devices and desktops.

On another note, I think the elliptical is the ultimate exercise machine: It's not too hard on the muscles, but you can still feel the burn. I'm only saying this because I used a stationary bike today and barely broke a sweat. I'm guessing I should have increased the resistance or something.

And finally, I miss you all. My current working situation makes it such that I don't see anyone anymore. It's kind of disappointing. But I suppose I should be happy that I at least have a job.

Anyone else want in on music sharing with me, Thom, John, and Brad?

2011-02-03T18:32:00.001-05:00

It's easy to start. We use this program called Dropbox. It's awesome, at least it is when people actually share music (I'm looking at you, John, Thom, and Brad). No one has been using it lately, and I'm trying to enliven it, much like this blog. Am I wasting more of my time?

Who did we lose?

2011-02-02T23:14:00.004-05:00

If you live in the Chicago/midwest area and don't respond to this post, I'm going to assume you were killed by the blizzard. And if you didn't see my fb post, my building's lobby windows were blown out and there was snow indoors. Proof:

Come see an improv show!

2011-01-26T23:13:00.004-05:00

Below is the page for my improv group at the iO theatre. We are called Nogat, which is what we imagined would be a name for an off-brand candy bar. It was that or Tuzzler.

http://chicago.ioimprov.com/io/teams/73

Come see a show! The schedule is on the link, and they're usually free, though we perform usually Monday or Wednesday nights, which I know are not the easiest. And, to be frank, while we are decent, it is improv and in all likelihood you could see a shitty show. Regardless, it'd mean a lot to have you come. If not, that's okay. I'm really just filling up space on the blog. Soon I'm just going to change the name of this to Andrew's Life, cause I'm the only one that posts on this *(@#()*!*$(# thing (this makes six straight posts from me).

I can't believe it

2011-01-24T10:06:00.002-05:00

http://www.cnn.com/2011/SHOWBIZ/celebrity.news.gossip/01/23/obit.jack.lalanne/index.html?hpt=T2

And I didn't put him on my list again cause apparently he was really fit. I hate the world.

Is it June yet?

2011-01-19T23:07:00.003-05:00

My job is quickly wearing me out with stress and frustration. Will one of you please bail me out with one of the following?
1) a time machine
2) a quadrillion dollars
3) students who aren't lazy and uneducated
4) hilarious fart sounds

New celebrity death pool

2011-01-05T19:59:00.002-05:00

Thom and anyone else who wants to partake:
It is time to start the new celebrity death pool. I propose the following rules:
1) You choose 10 people
2) If you participated last year, you are able to take a maximum of 5 of your 15 chosen.
3) At mid-year, 5 extra people can be chosen
4) If someone chooses any of the same people as you, the person who submitted the names first gets precedence
5) Each entrant must forfeit $10 to the winner
6) In the event of a tie, monies are split

Any other rules?

Resolutions

2010-12-29T02:45:00.003-05:00

This year, I resolve to:
1) Talk to women
2) Do things I don't want to do (see 1)
3) Somehow start having as much fun as I did in college again, which will entail a high amount of productivity, and lots of time with new and old friends.
4) Road trip. I'm really serious about this one. Two summers in a row have failed me. I want it.

One of the following people needs to die in the next 27 days

2010-12-04T16:44:00.002-05:00

Elizabeth Taylor
Fidel Castro
Ariel Sharon
Muhammad Ali
Zsa Zsa Gabor
Kirk Douglas
Roger Ebert
Ernest Borgnine
Margaret Thatcher
Dick Cheney
Stephen Hawking
Henry Kissinger
Jack LaLanne
Mickey Rooney
Ray Bradbury

Why, you may ask, do I want one of these people to die? Because the celebrity death pool between Thom and I has put me in the hole. Thom's LAST CHOICE was Gloria Stuart. And I just checked up on all his people and she bit it back in September. Lucky bastard.

Fortune cookie: You will enjoy a trip to Asia soon

2010-11-09T18:51:00.004-05:00

... of course, I got that fortune cookie about a year and a half ago.

Still - what's better than a trip to Japan? A free trip to Japan! What's even better than a free trip to Japan? BEING PAID to go to Japan, which is exactly what I'll be doing this December 6th-11th.

Okay, so I might have to give a presentation defending our company's new model train product ideas to a group of 30 individuals who don't really speak English and want desperately to shut the US branch down, and my failure may put both me and five other individuals out of a job as well as hasten the end of an entire hobby industry, but still! Japan! And I'm being paid to go!

Woon.

Word.

2010-11-08T22:11:00.000-05:00

This world is strange and wonderful. That's all I have to say.

I WIN.

2010-10-21T22:04:00.003-04:00

I am so proud and excited to say that today I found out that I will be placed on an improv team at Improv Olympic. It is the second-best known improv company in Chicago, the US, and arguably, the world. It is something I've been hoping for for about a decade and it means A LOT to me. People come from hundreds of miles away and move their lives to take classes at this place so they can have a chance at performing there. It is the result of a total of about six years of improv classes, reading the improv bible about eight times, and thousands of dollars.

What do I get out of it? Starting in around January, I'll get to perform with a group of people that I've known the past year and a half one night a week in front of paying audience members, I'll get to see any shows for free, and I'll get to interact and work with people I've admired for years. And anyone that's ever thought I sucked at anything, if they see me on stage they can basically just shove it. Please come see me perform so you can share in my joy. Just do it on a night that we don't suck as a group. Cause that can still happen, easily.

I think I need some new music

2010-10-17T20:02:00.002-04:00

Does anyone have any they can recommend?

I'm interested in the following, but will take other stuff. Thom, I'm looking in your direction particularly as you're usually the one who reads this and also because you have been my best source for new music.

1) I heard the Walkmen's album "You and Me" is pretty good.
2) I want MGMT's first album "Oracular Spectacular"
3) There's still some Modest Mouse I don't have
4) I need more of The Smiths & Morrissey
5) Likewise for Mos Def and Of Montreal
6) Blind Melon's "Soup"
7) More of the Black Keys (all I have is "Magic Potion)
8) Anything else that you think is great

I need the music because my life sucks right now thanks to my job. New music fuels my fire and I haven't had any new fuel for a while.

You can't make this stuff up.

2010-10-05T23:44:00.002-04:00

From the Trib:
"A man described as mentally unstable stopped his pickup truck in rural, out-of-the-way spots in Illinois and Indiana, randomly asking strangers questions about honeybees before opening fire".

I wish I was there to see it.
Man: "You know honeybees? They're weird."
Stranger: Whatever you say.
Man: DIE [takes gun out].

The Lo(a)ner

2010-10-05T19:53:00.003-04:00

Dear *Insert Student Loan Company Name*:

Why, oh why, do you think I have money? I selected "income-contingent" because I thought you would realize I don't have a lot of money, but apparently you like getting all theoretical, annualizing money that I don't have, nay, never will have each year as you estimate the "fair" payments I should make each month. Hopefully, my latest letter to you will clear things up. Thank you for your time. And yes, I refuse to be your friend, you lo(a)ner.

Cordially,
The Borrower

P.S.-Somewhere stored away in a closet there is a piece of paper that I paid way too much money for and now I can't make a profit off it. It would've been a good investment had the economy decided to remain healthy. Bummer, just a bummer.

And with this post...

2010-09-30T22:41:00.002-04:00

I tie the rest of the year for most posts. Since the start of this year, excluding the month of September, we've posted only 12 times; since the start of September, we've posted 12 times. I can't even figure out the math on the percentage that we increased our productivity! Thanks, everybody, but mainly Waple!

The bad news, the good news, and the ugly news

2010-09-30T22:24:00.003-04:00

The Bad News
It doesn't look like the job I thought I was going to get, the one that would have been permanent, will be mine after all. About a month ago someone made it sound like it was going to happen and then... nothing. And I can't afford to wait around worrying where my next paycheck is going to come from so, since my contract with them is up in a few weeks, I went on to...

The Good News
I landed a three- to four-month contract with another company. It was totally out of the blue, but perfect timing. They actually want me to start the day my other contract ends, which couldn't be more satisfying. Plus, the position offers me more opportunity to manage, which means I'll be building new marketable skills instead of doing essentially the same thing day-in and day-out.

The Ugly News
I'm still far from my ultimate goals, but I suppose I should look at the bright side: 1) I have goals and 2) I have my whole life to reach them.

Come see me perform!

2010-09-26T23:58:00.002-04:00

If any of you are free on Sunday nights around 7 or 8pm, I'd love if you could come by and see me perform with my improv group at iO! It's the student graduation run, which lasts for eight Sundays, and we've had six shows so far. So we'll have one more show this coming Sunday (10/3) and then our last one on 10/7. The show is $5, starting at 7pm at the iO Theater (3541 N Clark). If you wanted to come at 8pm that'd be okay too, cause there are five groups that perform and they start at 7pm, but the group I'm with is always either 8 or 8:30pm. The last group finishes at 9:30, so if you wanted to make it a shorter night, you don't have to be there right at 7pm. If you all can't make it, I won't hold it against you. It's kind of short notice on purpose, cause student shows can often times be extremely painful (see: tonight's show). But I've been doing well and it's looking like I have a shot at getting placed on a team that will perform there consistently! All of these eight shows serve as auditions, basically. So if that happens, you will have so many opportunities to see me!

an annual sara update!

2010-09-23T12:32:00.001-04:00

Hello! It’s been about 11 months since my last post, when I announced that I lost my job but gained a boyfriend. I kept saying to myself “I will post again when I get a job and have something good to report.” Well, the day has come! I just got hired for a temp position as an assistant to the school nurse at a middle school on the south side. It’s just data entry and filing, and will most likely only last 3 or 4 months, but still, it’s something.

Being unemployed for nearly a year has definitely been a learning/growing experience for me. I spent most of the year being depressed, doubting my skills as a social worker, and not knowing what to do with my life. I had always been an overachiever and worked really hard at school and then at my job, so when that was taken away from me I just didn’t know what to do with myself. You don’t realize how much of your identity is tied up in what you do for a living until your job is gone.

It took about 10 months for me to finally realize there is more to life than working and making money. I realized being unemployed was not the waste of time I thought it was, and I actually accomplished quite a lot in the last year. When I had a job, all I wanted was a boyfriend, someone who really knew me and I could talk to about anything. And here I am, about to celebrate my one year anniversary with Matt! I’ve never been in a serious relationship or been in love before, so the fact that I’ve been with Matt for so long is a huge accomplishment for me, just as big and important as landing my dream job. I’ve also become a lot closer with my parents, and especially my brother, whom I never used to talk to at all. I’ve gotten more involved in my hobbies, such as taking dance classes again, doing yoga multiple times a week, knitting, and learning to cook. I’ve had the time to really think about and work on things I didn’t like about myself, and finally break some bad habits, such as my m&ms addiction. And I’ve also been able to do a lot of fun things in the city that I wouldn’t have been able to do if I was still living and working in the suburbs. So while I’m still not sure what’s gonna happen with my social work career, I am much happier with other aspects of my life than I ever have been.

Here are some other exciting things I’ve done this year:

-went to Vegas for the first time

-had my car window broken and ipod stolen

-learned how to file a police report and insurance claim

-had some minor surgery on my cervix

-saw Lady Gaga at lollapalooza

-went on a yacht in Lake Michigan

-went to my first Sox game and Bears game

-ate a lot of sushi

-gotten much better at NY Times crossword puzzles

How cute!

2010-09-20T23:06:00.003-04:00

I hope you all watched the season premiere of "How I Met Your Mother" tonight. It was good, so good that it had, wait for it... lipstick lesbians!

Now, as a buzz-kill to that, cute kittens dressed in suits:
http://twitpic.com/2qfzh0

Be honest...

2010-09-20T23:02:00.001-04:00

do you think I would be a good creative writing instructor and/or professor of English?

Hello.

2010-09-16T20:15:00.001-04:00

Survey: Are you reading this? Please respond within the next week by commenting on this post.

Carmelo?

2010-09-09T22:51:00.002-04:00

Those of you who follow the Bulls, which is probably just Waple and me, should take note that Carmelo Anthony, an all-star who Charles Barkley calls "the greatest pure scorer in the NBA," wants to be traded to the Bulls. I was getting pumped about our new lineup for next season, but I must admit it'd be nice to bring in 'Melo. Of course, the Bulls will have to give up a lot, possibly Noah and Deng, but if we keep Rose and at least one good big guy (Boozer), it might be worth it.

Stress

2010-09-08T23:34:00.002-04:00

I might get employed (for real) soon, but I'm a bit stressed about it. I need to discuss it privately. E-mail me, friends!

I want a time machine.

2010-09-03T19:32:00.000-04:00

That is all.

Starfucker?

2010-09-03T01:29:00.002-04:00

Can anyone suggest if Starfucker is worth a listen? This song caught my ear in a recent Target Pharmacy commercial and I liked the style.

I'm going to try and post more.

2010-09-01T22:27:00.002-04:00

This blog has gone stagnant again. Maybe it's futile to keep it going in the midst of facebook and all, but I want it to live on, so I will post. Maybe this will just become my blog in the future.

School starts in five days. September 7th, to be exact. I'm totally unprepared (not totally my fault). I have read a lot this summer, but the curriculum of the course was changed by the admin like three weeks before school started, so even if I had done a lot of prep work it would have been a waste. Also, I tend to underestimate my abilities and over-worry myself. Mostly, I'm just bummed because it's so great to be so free in the summer and get personal things done (reading, organizing, etc.) that I can't do in the school year when I am swamped. And I will be swamped this year, since it's a new school and subject. I will mostly miss seeing all my friends. In addition to being overly busy, I know being in the city prevents me from seeing people as often. That sucks a lot, and I don't know what will happen to change that.

In addition, my kitchen is still non-existent. I hooked up my new fridge five days ago, and it was the first fully functional fridge my place has had in its year of existence. So it was a great relief to have an appliance hooked up at all, first of all, and secondly to have it work well. The rest of the place is in shambles - no mounted cabinets, no functional range, nowhere to sit, and a bedroom full of most of my furniture and everything else I could cram in, leaving nowhere to maneuver freely. My one place of refuge is the 10 sq. ft. around my computer. I hope that it's all done soon, like in a few weeks, ideally, so that when I'm stressed after a day of school I can come home, relax on a couch, watch TV, and make some food. All things I can't do right now.

Finally, on the new student front, I saw some of the names of the students I'll be having next year. It only took two names before one of them was named after liquor. Cavoursier. It's a misspelling, I know, but it still sounds the same. I saw some more names today. Majestic was one. It's an interesting cultural phenomenon. Maybe that would be a good name for a kid. Phenomenon. Phenomenon Waple. I actually kind of like it. And kids would call him 'Nom for short.

Anyway, I hope all's well and that those of you looking for jobs are making progress. I'll be really stressed this year, but really thankful to have a job too. Please come visit me any time.

Love,
'Nom.

Celebrity death pool revisited

2010-08-17T00:50:00.002-04:00

As far as I can tell, no one on Thom and my celebrity death pool has dies this year. Now, there's still time for Dick Cheney to shoot himself in the face or have a heart attack, or for Wilford Brimley to die ironically of diabetes, it's looking like it might end up a tie.

Do we want to spurn some new interest by adding some new people to the hit list?

Chicity

2010-07-23T23:52:00.001-04:00

If you're in or within a reasonable radius of Chicago and you're an awesome friend, let's all plan a big get-together soon. Who's in?

Steve's Wedding

2010-07-12T02:03:00.003-04:00

I can't wait for the debauchery of this coming weekend. This is one time I'm glad Steve is getting married. Bloomington makes my soul happy, even though I sold it to Thom.

News

2010-05-24T22:13:00.006-04:00

I instead got my hands on this lovely 45:
It cost a little more, but the cool news is it came with a letter of appraisal from the foremost Beatles autograph expert who valued it at $3000 more than what I paid! And it's a lot cooler than just a piece of paper. If you're nice to me I'll let you lick it some time.

In other news, I finally got a cell phone. Ben, I need your number. Mike told me he got a call from you the other day and I thought you were still out of the country. So I don't know what the right way to reach you is, but I want your number so I can drunk dial you.

Also, renovations on my condo will hopefully start sometime this June and finish in July. I hope you all can come down and spend some fun times in the city with me this summer. If you need any reasons, here's the best one: I live a mile from a beach. It'd be really fun to have a day at the beach and then come back and hang out in the city, have dinner, drink, and play video games. Raise your hand if that sounds good. Both of mine are up.

Never call me cheap again

2010-03-11T21:59:00.003-05:00

Why? Because I am about to spend lots of my hard-earned money on this:

This is a piece of paper signed by all four Beatles in 1963. I have wanted something like this most of my life, and yes, there is a part of me that is wondering why I'm spending thousands of dollars on a piece of paper. However, there's another part of me that says, "Cause it's fucking awesome. That's why."

Join us!

2010-03-06T22:27:00.000-05:00

Hey Waple... buy one. "One of us! One of us!"

Via: Cell Phones

so suave.

2010-02-15T22:37:00.005-05:00

may 2006

happy valentine's day.

2010-02-14T23:55:00.009-05:00

Radiohead performance!

2010-02-04T17:24:00.003-05:00

In case you haven't heard, Radiohead did a special performance recently to benefit the victims of the earthquake in Haiti. They auctioned off the seats and made a lot of money for donations. They also debuted a new song allegedly from the new album they're currently working on. There is a link to the bootleg of the performance available here. Enjoy!

My new job

2010-02-01T22:49:00.002-05:00

For those of you who don't know and still read this (no one? Palmer? Ben?), I got a new job. I am going to be working at New Westinghouse high school, which is a Chicago Public School on the west side of Chicago in Garfield Park. It is actually a pretty rough neighborhood, but the school is one of only a handful of selective enrollment schools in Chicago, so that means the kids that are there want to be there. I hope that means discipline problems won't be much of an issue, and same for interest in the subjects. The neighborhood does make me question public transport, though. It'd be nice to be able to get rid of my car and save a few thousand a year, but we'll see.

There's a lot I still don't know about the job. I don't know what I'm teaching yet or if they'll want me to coach anything. All I know is that I'm going to be super busy and that I'm getting a huge pay raise from my current job. I'm looking forward to it, but I'm mostly just relieved. Getting a new job has been on my list for a while and I was really going to be in a pinch if I was at the same school again next year, earning little and being far away from my condo in the city. This new job basically means I can run my life completely independently. I'll get a cell phone. I'll be at my condo all the time. I'll meet new people in the city. And I'll pay for it all. That last part I'm not so excited about, but I guess it's all part of growing up that I've staved off long enough. I just hope that with this new job I have time to do the things I love: See improv shows, do improv, exercise, possibly even get a girlfriend (gasp) and keep my sanity. On the other hand, getting a new job right now is pretty hard to do. I had emailed districts I had connections with to see what their status was for this coming year and not only were they not hiring, they were actually cutting back. That put my new job into a new perspective - not that I didn't know already that it was an ugly job market.

I don't know how long I'll be at this new school because you never know what can happen, but I hope they like me as much as the administration liked me at my current school. It's nice to feel like your job is secure. I also don't know how often I'll be seeing all my friends who are now not so near as before. I know it's not easy to come into the city, but that's going to be my biggest concern - keeping up friendships with people I won't see as often. That being said, everyone is welcome at my place literally any time for as long as you want. I'll put pictures up of what it looks like soon, but most have seen it and I still don't have a bed. So whenever I get things all tricked out you'll see what it looks like.

There's a football fan in all of us

2010-01-21T22:06:00.005-05:00

Whether you like football or not, I can almost prove that there's another version of you out there that DOES like football. How can I prove it? Well, I was looking online at photos from crazy football fans from this year and a few of the photos stood out because some aspect of the people in them reminded me strongly of some of my awesome friends. See if you can guess who and why.

What are the top three things you would want to do for a living?

2010-01-17T21:26:00.002-05:00

Unrealistic:
Rock star
Famous comedian
Advocate for the poor

Realistic:
Carpenter
Teacher
Dodgeball business owner

New celebrity death pool?

2009-12-20T23:00:00.002-05:00

I take you back six months to when I posted my picks for my own celebrity death pool, after Thom told me about the morbid pool he had at work with co-workers.

http://smithground.blogspot.com/2009/06/celebrity-death-pool.html

Well, none of my picks came through, but I'm willing to try again for 2010. Anyone else in with me? Maybe you can enlighten us with some of the rules, Thom. How many picks do we make?

Justice

2009-12-18T17:22:00.002-05:00

So, today I finished jury duty. Have any of you ever served on a jury? It's kind of a painstaking process, but I still recommend that every citizen get the chance to do it at least once. It gave me a better appreciation for the judicial system and yet it made me realize how very flawed it can be. At the same time, I think it's probably one of the best justice systems in the world, however imperfect it might be. What has everyone else been up to?

Happy holidays!

2009-12-14T16:04:00.000-05:00

I moved in!

2009-11-27T17:25:00.002-05:00

I finally moved into my condo with the help of my friend Mark today. I was really happy to see that my furniture and the rest of my stuff should fit in pretty well. Also, since I bought the place with the purpose renovating it, I was happy to hear Mark, the carpenter friend, say "Oh yeah, this will be really easy to fix up." And then he started spouting ideas about what to do and how easy it would be. Although I'm sure it'll be a year or so until it's started, it's something to look forward to. Plus, my view of the lake from my windows hasn't gotten old yet, and I don't think it will. It's just so peaceful to see a big blue expanse that stretches out as far as your eye can see. I hope you can all come down and see it some time, and know that whenever you need a place to stay it's always open, even if I'm doing nine hot chicks. In fact, especially if I'm doing nine hot chicks.

Happy Thanksgiving!

2009-11-25T16:49:00.001-05:00

Here you go, knuckleheads.

2009-11-05T08:12:00.003-05:00

Notice the fantabulous photostream to the right. All you have to do is post a photo to Flickr and tag it "smithgroundblog" and it'll show up. Do it. Do it now.

I'd make it so you knuckleheads can add photos as I have them now, but there's all kinds of coding involved. Wapes, how's yer CSS and HTML these days? Maybe Mike should do it. Or Randall. They're both web friendly.

adding photos

2009-10-26T20:42:00.001-04:00

Anyone know how to add photos to the side of the blog like the two that have been there forever? I want to put some up. This blog needs an injection of new spirit.

ranting

2009-10-23T16:08:00.002-04:00

Not sure anyone still reads this, but I will rant here anyway.

I got fired yesterday. For real. It came out of nowhere, I walked in to what I thought was my normal weekly meeting with my boss, and there's the HR director sitting there, telling me they're making some changes to the therapist position, and one of those changes is that I'm "dismissed." They gave me a sheet describing what I've been doing wrong, mainly that they think I'm not doing enough to push the kids to work on their issues, and that my skills and experience aren't a good match for the severity of the kids we work with. I've never been written up or given any kind of formal warning about my job performance before this. I got an above average rating on my yearly evaluation in May. However that evaluation was written by my old boss who loved me. But she quit in june and was replaced by a new boss who apparently does not love me and thinks I'm a bad therapist. I had to clean out my office and leave immediately, I couldn't say goodbye to anyone. My coworker, who is black, has also been written up twice in the last two weeks and is about to be fired also. She's convinced the agency is discriminating against non-latino people, and wants me to join her in a lawsuit against them. When I was fired they offered me a $1200 severance package if I sign a contract agreeing not to sue them. The fact that they offered me that shows that I do probably have grounds to sue them, or else they wouldn't be bribing me to shut up. However, I'm not really a vengeful person and would much rather just take the money and move on, instead of putting effort into a lawsuit that probably won't go anywhere. I don't want to work in a place where I'm not appreciated anyway.
Obviously I was crushed when this all happened, but I'm trying to look on the bright side now. I hadn't been happy with my job for the last few months anyway, I didn't like my boss, the commute and the hours were killing me, and I agree the kids deserve a better therapist than me. So I'm excited to look for a new job where I fit in and can use my strengths and excell. Ideally with a much shorter commute, or a commute into the city so I'll have a reason to then move into the city. I'm also kinda excited about all this free time stretching out in front of me, I'll finally have time to go to the gym everyday, clean the house, hang out with people on weeknights, and all the other things I never had time for before. So, I'm kinda at a crossroads in terms of what to do with my life, but hopefully it'll work out for the best. Let me know if anyone knows of any social work jobs.

Thom Yorke's new band

2009-10-06T22:07:00.001-04:00

In case you missed the news, Thom Yorke has a new band! I'm pumped! By the way, this doesn't mean Radiohead is broken up; they're just on hiatus. Yay for supergroups!

Seriously?

2009-09-10T11:42:00.001-04:00

I file-system-checking HATE this town. Honestly, can't a guy have a new car for more than like a month before someone rear-ends him?

Damnit.

Some more live Radiohead

2009-09-06T19:06:00.002-04:00

The site with live Radiohead shows went down for a while, and much to my surprise, is back up! There's a nice live show they have on there to download from a BBC3 broadcast. Not the whole thing, but what's there is nice.

http://www.radiohead-notforprofit.com/2009/09/01/radiohead-live-bbc3-reading-083009-mp3s/

October 10th

2009-08-24T19:59:00.002-04:00

I'm excited for Charles and my birthday celebration. Let's us this as a forum for ideas. Sara already came up with a Jungle theme, but last time we tried a theme (vampires), we only got as far as a cape, red cups, and Ben talking in a hilarious accent. So maybe a theme is more than we can handle. If we really wanted to, we could do that. I do love Rainforest Cafe, and there is Congo River for putt-putt, but beyond that I don't know.

Questions to answer:
Where? City/Suburbs? House? Bars? My potential place in the city?
When? I'll be busy from noon-3pm on Saturday and in the city already, if that matters.
What? Drinking is always fun, but I always enjoy just the company of friends, and so far we have me, Mike, Sara, Thom, Mark, Tim, Charles (& Janet, I assume). I think I want to see Charles drunk, and Janet. And Sara. And everyone.
Gifts? No. Well, maybe a drink. And a hug and a smile.
Dinner? Sara suggested Rainforest Cafe, which is good, but I'm not tied to it by any means. Personally, my favorite restaurant is Cheesecake Factory. And maybe we can go somewhere that takes coupons to make paying the bill that much more complicated!

A place to call my own

2009-08-18T21:03:00.003-04:00

I am putting in an offer for a condo tomorrow. I'm excited, but I still have a long way to go until I actually have a place. It might not even be this one in the end, but I'm going to be buying something. It's the orange one.

Mike and Waple go to Memphis! And come back (a photo essay)!

2009-08-04T00:55:00.019-04:00

Jesus really IS everywhere! Even Bumblefuck, USA!
Hah. Can't find us out on my uncle's farm in southern IL, can you, Jesus?
I wish Jesus was here to help me cool my swamp ass. Instead, I'll have to struggle to funnel the a/c into my shorts. Nice.
At the Memphis Zoo. It's all Egyptian because Memphis is named after Memphis, Egypt. Highlight of the trip. Three words: Otters fighting Gibbons.

Don't let his cuteness fool you. He's got like 10 friends that'll beat your punk ass. It happened to a bunch of gibbons. Seriously.
Where you get herpes.
Stay classy, Conway.
While Mike was getting drunk off shitty booze, I chose to play it cool and just have some apple juice.
Mike tuning his guitar for NerdHero.
The competition was fierce for champion Nerd. Mike won.
Lowlight of the trip: Civil Rights Museum where Martin Luther King, Jr. was killed. My fault. I heard it was good. It was tons of reading and standing.
Note: it looks like Steve is saying something about the Motel sign, and I imagine it's something racist and offensive like, "Hey, I bet there's a vacancy now." Get it?
We ate at a famous burger joint downtown called Huey's. The burgers were good, but the best part was shooting toothpicks into the foam tile ceiling as you can Steve demonstrating. Beth approves.
We then stopped at the Peabody Hotel downtown to see the ducks that live in their fountain in the lobby. Don't ask.
On the roof of the Peabody. Nice photo ruined by a bunch of morons.
That's better. That's the Mighty Mississippi/Big Muddy/Old Man River in the background.
We found a time machine and jumped back to 1931 so I could get a black and white photo of downtown. AWESOME!
When we returned, we found that somehow we'd altered the space-time continuum so that all drinks only came in gallon buckets. AWESOMER! If only that were true and we weren't just on Beale Street drinking a gallon of booze in the middle of the day at a bar with goats...
Another great photo ruined by those same morons. Mike kept the bucket-o-booze.

At Rendezvous waiting for our table, which was reserved under the name "Bieznootz," per usual. And mispronounced, per usual. "By-ez-notz." Morons.
Back to Beale Street for a night photo.
If you want to know how big that thing is, go find out! It's got its own website! Bible Belt Five!

Things I learned this week

2009-07-26T21:15:00.002-04:00

1 - Memphis is an extremely poor city, but has an awesome zoo

2 - Otters are the greatest thing ever

3 - Driving long distances sucks

4 - A 4 and a half ton ford truck will sustain no damage when flattening a Honda Civic hatchback. The hatchback will be totalled.

Protip: Watch both ways before driving across the street. Stay safe, everyone!

yo sup

2009-07-10T16:44:00.002-04:00

To Waple I recommend live in the city - it is fun!
I am currently not "in the city" (Austin is half-suburb half-city), though i have new apartment and it is perched quite lovely in the trees! cawww!
So um, to Thom - sorry I missed your call. I've been working 9-5 this summer in our Arabic program, then I walk home in 104 degree Fahrenheit and pass out on my futon.
Then I awaken at midnight, to have a cup of coffee, grade homework, dance and then try to bang my head against the wall for not resisting the vicious cycle of pass-out naps, midnight coffee and banging my head against the wall.
It's not likely i'll be able to get to Chicago this summer - our midsummer "break" is saturday and sunday, and then we have only a week and half between the end of the program and the beginning of the fall semester. yikes! right?
Peace out to y'all in yo' comfortably below-hundred-degree North.

Buying a house

2009-07-09T11:04:00.001-04:00

So I'm probably going to start looking at places to live soon. Any input on whether I get a place in the burbs (if so, where? Closer to the city or out here?) or in the city?

Creepy News to Start your Monday

2009-06-29T10:00:00.003-04:00

First off, we'll go with the slightly ominous, but also slightly cool:
Biological fuel cell - A device with a lot of useful potential for implanted devices, such as heart monitors or blood sugar detectors (for people with diabetes). Not so bad, though a little odd if you start thinking about 10 gallon drums filled with blood to power heavy machinery.

Then you get into the nightmare fuel:
Carniverous Clock - A clock that powers itself by capturing insects, dumping them in a vat of bacterial solvents and harvesting their life force to power its terrible difference engine.

The matrix wasn't THAT far off, it looks like. Except in the future the robots wont bother keeping us alive, they'll just be breeding us like cattle and tossing us into big dissolution vats after sucking out our blood for their fuel cells.

I'm going to go cry in a corner now.

Celebrity death pool

2009-06-28T19:05:00.003-04:00

Thom, wasn't it you who told me a year or so ago that you and your coworkers were in on a celebrity death pool one year? Someone has gotta be raking it in right now, although I don't know if I'd put pitchman Billy Mays on a list of celebrities...

If I had to guess who's going to go next, I'd say Nelson Mandela or Queen Elizabeth II. They're both so OLD.

My dark horse in the race would be Kirstie Alley.
The person I most wish would die: Dick Cheney or Fred Phelps (of the Westboro Baptist Church).
Others that are likely to die: Wilford Brimley, Joan Rivers, Keith Richards and Mick Jagger

My favorite candy

2009-06-26T00:33:00.003-04:00

I am curious as to what everyone's favorite candies are. Here are my top 3 chocolate and non-chocolate, in order.

Chocolate
1. Twix
2. Kit Kat (close second)
3. 100 Grand

Non-chocolate (this was tough)
1. Jelly Bellies
2. Skittles (all kinds, but has anyone seen those chocolate skittles? WTF?)
3. Lemonheads

Honorable mention:
Plain Hershey's
Malted milk balls
Snickers
Rock candy
Those swirly multi-colored lolli-pops
Lifesaver Wint-O-Green mints
Any candy stolen from children

IQ test

2009-06-25T01:13:00.002-04:00

I'm tired of just assuming I'm smarter than everyone and want to prove it. Have any of you ever taken an IQ test? I want to take one.

MEMPHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS!!!

2009-06-04T22:33:00.003-04:00

I am going to go to Beale Street and the MLK museum and Graceland, and I'm going to be stone drunk every step of the way and it's going to be awesome. I'm going to puke on Beale Street. I'm going to puke on the spot MLK was shot. And I'm going to puke on Elvis' garage door.

Get ready to get puked on, Memphis.

Grossly inappropriate

2009-06-02T16:29:00.001-04:00

Anyone care to guess why? We can make a game of it!

Your daily dose of madness

2009-06-01T23:35:00.003-04:00

Presenting ... ZLAD!

5... 4... 3... 1! OFFBLAST!

And of course, the clear follow-up!

Best cantaloupe imagery used in a fake balkan state keytar assisted 80's metal anthem? I think so!

2009-05-27T23:17:00.000-04:00

Them's fightin' words, boy.

that's enough of that.

2009-05-27T00:06:00.001-04:00

All right, I have made a promise to post when I visit again. I have been too lax and now Mike is getting out of control with his sometimes pointless posts (see below).

2009-05-26T18:59:00.002-04:00

Two blondes are walking through the forest when they come across some tracks.

The first blonde turns to the second and says "those look like bear tracks, we should be careful"

The second looks and says to the first "No, those are clearly deer tracks, we should be fine"

....

While they were arguing, a train came and killed them both.

*rimshot*

Propaganda!

2009-05-22T16:26:00.005-04:00

... Yeah, so it's a long and tiresomely boring day at work today. That is all.

It's quiet around here...

2009-05-19T09:13:00.003-04:00

... Too quiet. Someone must be up to something.

things to do

2009-05-06T23:55:00.002-04:00

Since turning 26 this week, I have been contemplating my life and reflecting on all that I have accomplished. I remember the first time I ordered pizza sophomore year of college, my first time pumping gas at age 20, my first train ride by myself... I've really come quite far! So it made me think, what else is there to accomplish in life?? Here's a list of random things I have never done, despite being 26 (note: this is not necessarily a to do list, as I have little desire to do any of these things):

1. ordered food at a drive thru window (talking in that intercom freaks me out)
2. taken my car in for an oil change or maintenance (my dad does it for me)
3. called information to get a phone number or address
4. used a coffee maker
5. done taxes
6. washed my own car (although I have washed other people's at fundraisers)
7. used power tools, or maybe any tools, I can't really remember
8. mowed a lawn
9. been to a dry cleaners or travel agent
10. ordered in any type of food besides pizza (chinese, sandwiches, etc.)

I'm sure there's more, I just can't think of it right now. I'll let you know if I accomplish any of these this year.